Hilde

I feel like God in all his mercy is pouring out his spirit and power over me these days. Especially after saturday. I wake up in the mornings and feel God’s presence. Someone might just start playing a few chords on the guitar and it releases the longing I feel for God’s presence. When worshipping I just feel like jumping and running around, because God moves me with such energy. He inspired me to write a new song to him two days ago. Yesterday we sang it at our cell group.

Im walking in more faith these days. I dare new things. I say out loud what I believe, because it strengthens my faith. I also say out loud what I want to believe because it creates new faith. I experience more and more that faith is important because it allows God to do his things. I’m not one of those that believe that if you just believe enough, God will heal you and such things. Some people seem to think that, but we in our own little power can’t make God do anything. Everything he does is just out of mercy. That’s why I believe that our faith must be given us by God. We can’t force forth faith! Anyway, God has made himself dependent on our faith. Where people don't believe in him, he won’t do anything. But where people believe in him, their expectations and prayers allow him to come with his presence and healing. Mark 4:24 says: "With the measure ye mete, it shall be measured to you, and unto you that hear shall more be given." My Nowegian translation says something like: "With the measure you use, it will be measured to you, and even more will be given you."

I think it makes a good picture: God will always give us a little more than we expect. If our cups of expectations are small he will fill it up and let it overflow. If our cups of expectations are large he will still fill it up and let it overflow! I want my cup to be LARGE! I want to see more of God!

This is all mercy! I have realized that mercy is so much more than just forgiveness and salvation. It’s only of mercy that I can wake up in the morning and immediately feel God’s presence. It’s only because of mercy I receive words over my life. Only mercy allows me to serve God with my talents and gifts. Only God in his mercy gives faith.

Yesterday was so inspiring! I'm a music student, but haven't felt like I've known how to use my music. For the last year or so I haven't been part of any worship team. Throughout the last few years I've been thinking about how we use music in worship. I had an experience about four years ago that made me realize that we not only can say things to God through music, but he can also say things to us! Music is actually a tool for Him to pour out His spirit over us! After that experience I've met more people believing that and experiencing it. And somewhere in my heart I have been wanting it and longing to see it more, even though I for different reasons haven't thought a lot about it the last year or so. But after thursday I have been so useasy and longing, and yesterday I took some time with God, and I felt like he told me that He will bring me into that, and that he will use me musically. When my church gathered later that afternoon, I shared these thoughts. Our church has received words about music earlier as well, and I believe it encouraged people. I also received a word about this through Ylva afterwards, which was really encouraging. I really think God will use music to reveal and pour out his power in Oslo KF, Oslo in general and everywhere christians gather together to sing and play!

Today I started looking forward to the summer. I've been enjoying all the snow so much, even through all of March, but as I was riding my bike today I saw the first spring flowers, and was simply delighted:)

I came back from Bergen today. I've been to KF's easter conference. Unfortunately I had to leave before it was over (but it was worth it since I get to spend time at home with mom, dad and my brother). It was really inspiring and good. Hopefully I will read a lot more bible and become better at hearing God's voice after this. I wanna see the world praise God! :D 

Actually it was my first time in Bergen ever, which is a little bit strange. I liked it though.

How can I know that what I believe is true is true? How can I know that God is who the Bible says he is? I’ve been spending some time with people that believe differently than me, and it always makes me question my own faith. It is very important to do that, because how else can I know that I do not only believe out of habit or comfort or other feelings? I think it is important that I believe what is true, not just what is pleasurable.

I saw Elvira Nikolaisen tell Fredrik Skavland about her beliefs during “Først og sist” on Friday. She grew up in a believing home, and used to believe in God herself. Now she doesn’t. She said she came to a point where her brains said something different about the truth than her feelings or habits. That made me think: do I believe what I believe simply because that’s what I’ve always done, and that’s what feels comfortable? It’s more important to me what is really true than what feels comfortable. Sometimes doubt comes over me, and this was one of the times. I started asking myself: How can I find out what is most likely to be true?

I’ve heard about people walking away from their faith because of doubt. Somehow it is easy to think that I should try something else for a while, quit praying and reading my bible for a while to find out what is true, because it might allow me to find out that something else is true. But then I thought to myself: Hilde, if someone tells you something that you’re in doubt about, how can you find out if it is true? -Probably not by stopping thinking about it. Probably not by talking to someone else about something different either. I would rather have to question it, study it, do research on it. And I thought: to find out if the bible is true you’ll have to read it more! Study it, do researches on it, test it! If it is true, you’ll discover it.

And thinking about all my Christian life, I think I already have discovered it.